What's on the Menu of Menus?

A few years back, my friend Wendy and I sampled all the wares at the Houston Press's Menu of Menus. While at Jones Hall or the Wortham Center, (or whichever that joint is where the Opera performs), we sampled, snacked, and sipped our way through the tables until we were stuff to the gills.

Both of us fondly remember eating several new treats that included bubble tea, green tea ice cream, and Ethiopian fare. Before we knew it, we'd filled ourselves on soups, steak, shrimp, souffle, and a variety of other foods that did not begin with the letter "s". In short, there were more vendors there any a person could physically sample. The layout allowed lines to form without pushing, and for sitting on the floor to sample the plates.

About 7:30, the initial crowd thinned out and Wendy and I felt as though we had our run of the place. We could walk up, talk to the vendors, nibble, and move on with having another over-eater breathing down our necks. One person even joked that they has so much left over that we should have brought our Tupperware.

When I went to this year's Menu of Menus, I assure you, my expectations were high. Very high. Which is probably why the event was fairly disappointing.

First, we went a little after 7:30 to avoid the big rush. Big mistake. Obviously, the vendors learned that they would have extras and made less food. Many restaurants were already out of food, some 2.5 hours before the event ended. And the rush wasn't over-- there were still tons of people around, which is a good thing, but just disappointing if you're going to eat and food is running out.

Second, the venue was a challenge. I like the idea of having it a the museum, however it's just not practical. The spaces are small and bend around T-rexes and stuffed gazelles. That makes for tight lines and cramped spaces. Sometimes it was hard to tell which line I was in and I was really tired of pushy people.

Another change was the clientele. Many of those in attendance were there for a date, not for food. Which is fine, but if that's the case, get out of line. Strapless black dresses have not, I assure you, gone out of style this season. Please, wear them with stilettos as well.

But the biggest disappointment was the selection of food. There wasn't much to choose from. There were 40 vendors this year, which seems remarkably less than in the past, particularly because at least 15 of those were wine and/or coffee vendors. Of the reamining 25 places, there wasn't the impressive array I remember. Murphy's Deli, while good, isn't something unusual that I would want to try at a tasting gala. I already know what I am going to get. The same goes for Sweet Tomatoes. One of my favorite places to get a salad, but not at a gig like this. Frankly, the lack of array made me feel a little jipped and like, perhaps, the planners were lazy.

But let's talk about what was good. There were some very good victuals.

Coffee Grounz, which is opening soon in Midtown had a phenomenal frozen vanilla latte. Get it, it's worth the calories.

Mi Pueblito had some good salsa and beans, which makes it hard to judge whether it's good or not.

The Shrimp House provided a very yummy shrimp with jalapeno, a new twist on something very tasty. The menu consists of fried food baskets mostly, which isn't a problem for those gunning for a heart attack.

Sushi at a place like this has the potential to go funny in no time. Tokyohana is no exception. I tried a spicy roll and was a little grossed out. In mid chew, I looked at my sister, shook my head, and swollowed almost whole. It's not Tokyohana's fault, just circumstances. I might try it again. Then again, I might not. Another thing that didn't translate well was Cascadas's seafood enchiladas. It might be a great place to eat, but cream and seafood don't hold well.

Perhaps Asian food is made for a tasting like this. The Red Basil shumai were amazing with an excellent soy/teriyaki sauce. Definitely a favorite. As were the rolls and fetuccini alfredo from Italiano's Restaurant. I don't know how often I'll get to far Westheimer (Red Basil) or Humble (Italiano's), but it's good to know that if I am in the area, I might try it.

The best of the best was the Golden Samovar. They had chicken kebabs with rice flavored with nuts and dried fruit. It was delectible. There were also pita strips that were fried and melted on your tongue. Unfortunately, it's far out on Westheimer, which makes it impractical for regular dining.

The Menu of Menus is a great concept, however this year's was a bit of a disappointment. I got plenty to eat, but mostly from places that are a far drive. This is, afterall, held in downtown Houston, and most who would attend are from inside the loop. I'm not against going out of the loop, but it just takes some actual planning to get to most of the restaurants. It might be better idea to have places that are a little more accessible to those in attendance.

I am not scratching the Menu of Menus off my list of annual events, I am just putting it on hiatus until the venue changes and the vendor list is expanded.